Last Night of Innocence
by bluemoongirl27
Summary: AU Takes place from the fire place confession scene in Attack of the Clones and beyond. Anakin and Padme decide to continue the evening by exploring the Naboo lake retreat. They go on they're own little excursion.
1. By Fire Light

Chapter 1: By Fire Light

"My heart is beating hoping that kiss will not become a scar."

His words just kept pounding into her head over and over. She didn't want the night to end like this with her last words being: "Could you, Anakin, could you live like that?"

She felt terrible proclaiming to him: "that she had more important things to do then fall in love".

Padme Naberri knew why she said it, and it wasn't because she didn't love him; it was because she loved him too much. She believed every word he had confessed to her; she couldn't bear to hurt him. But like she said: "Jedi are not allowed to marry". Padme was there on Tatooine when Anakin had to part with his mother. She knew how hard that was for him. Anakin Skywalker had been through a tough life as a slave, and now he was being tormented by his feelings for her. The last thing she wanted to do was bring any more confusion, and aguish into his life. He had left his mother to train to be a Jedi. She was not going to let him throw that sacrifice away. Why did her life have to always be about duty and sacrifices? She had found that she was happier, and more alive in the

short time that they had spent together with him as her bodyguard then any other time in her life. She didn't want it to end now. She wanted to be with him, wanted to kiss him again, and she wanted to make love to him. Make love, the words sounded foreign to her, probably because the most she had experienced emotionally or physically was kissing. From what she could gather, it was the same for Anakin. In fact she would bet her life that their kiss was the first ever for him.

Up until the moment she had seen him again in her apartment in Coruscant she had thought of him only as a little boy. Now, wow was all she could come up with. He had grown to become the most handsome, and sexiest man she had ever had the privilege to lay eyes on; with not to mention the most beautiful blue eyes she had ever seen. Padme was convinced that if you looked into them long, and deep enough; you could see heaven. And what made him the sexiest above all other men was the way he would look, and talk to her. "Grown more beautiful" rolled off his lips and she was putty in his hands to mold and play with.

Those hands.. Her mind drifted to earlier to when she felt him stroke her arm and her back. She could still hear his heavy breathing; it took everything in her to hold back her desire for him on that balcony overlooking the lake. But now she was sick and tired of holding back because after all she was a grown 24 year old woman, and he a grown man.

Would it be so terrible to give into their desires and enjoy each other, even if it's only just for one night? Padme was torn between two parts of herself: the one who played by the rules all of her young life, and the woman who was dying to escape. This was a part of Padme that no one knew, not even her. It was the part of her that had suddenly been awakened by his presence. Her whole body and soul was on fire from that kiss.

She didn't know what to do. Give into the angel or the devil, or maybe something in between?

"You're right, it would destroy us" his words bringing her back to reality.

"But I can't help how I feel, I don't care what the rules say or how hard it would be, I'd live that lie for you. But if you don't love me or won't love me then I guess you won't live it for me" he said with hurt in his eyes".

She stood frozen at his words.

"I'm sorry my lady, I guess it's best if we say good night" he said as he turned to walk out.

"Ani wait, don't leave like this".

"Like what Padme?"

"Maybe, maybe that kiss doesn't have to become a scar"?

"What do you mean "?

"I don't know what I mean I just know that I can't forget about that kiss".

"I can't either".

"Then let's see where the night takes us Ani."

"All right" he said puzzled, but excited at the same time.

"I'm in the mood for some wine". She said as she took his hand and led him towards the kitchen.

The lake retreat was dark and quiet as Anakin and Padme walked together towards the kitchen. There was something so wonderful, and almost forbidden knowing that they were the only one's awake. To them it felt like they were the only two people awake on the planet, in the universe. They had now stepped into their own little hidden world only they could unlock the door to.

She led him into a huge kitchen; which in the day time flooded lots of light from the windows over marble countertops and gold fixtures. She grabbed two goblets and a bottle of red wine from the rack. Padme had no idea what she was doing and loved it. She was feeding into the naughty side of her; which she suspected began with her choice of attire she had picked earlier in the evening. She was wearing the sexiest thing she had pulled out of her closet and for that matter out of her wardrobe. Why had she worn it? Maybe because it's tight, black, and shows your cleavage off for his eyes to feast on? Was she trying to tease him, torture him? He had made no secret from his manner and his hot eyes that he was turned on every time he looked at her up and down. It pleased her to know that she had this almost magical power over him.

"Do you like red wine Anakin"?

"I never had it; Obi-Wan wouldn't allow it." He says, "A Jedi must keep his mind clear and untainted". He said with a mocking tone. The Jedi don't allow drinking; they're too afraid you might get intoxicated".

"Well I don't think a little wine will hurt; it can be quite soothing if you don't over indulge. I like having wine sometimes before I go to bed it calms my nerves after a long strenuous day. The life of a senator can really get to me sometimes".

"I know what you mean; the life of a Jedi can as well. Don't get me wrong I love it, I do but there are things about being a Jedi I didn't bargain for".

"Like what?" she said softly.

"Well for one thing I can't just hop in my speeder and take off whenever I have the impulse. I have to always tell Obi-Wan where I'm going and when I'll be back. And I'm sick of it, and it's going to change from now on. I'm going to be a Jedi soon, and then I'll have more freedom to come and go as I please. I'm tired of being treated, and looked upon like I'm still a little kid being pulled back and forth on Obi-Wan's leash."

"I know what you mean, I feel like that too sometimes with my responsibilities as a Senator. Everyone expects so much, and there's just so much that you can give.

But I'm sure Obi-Wan would be sad to know you feel this way. I'm sure he doesn't see you that way."

"I'm not so sure about that".

"He loves you Ani I know he does I can feel it".

"Yeah I know he does, I do too he's the closest thing to a father I've ever had. He and I both know that".

"And like a father he loves you, and wants what he thinks is best for you".

"I know, I know, but I also miss Master Qui-Gon".

"Yes he was a good man. I'm glad I had the privilege to know him, and he was right about me trusting his instincts about you". As a queen I think I was a little hard on him".

"Well you were just thinking of your people; you're a very giving, and loving person.

I just wish Master Qui-Gon would have warned me."

"Warned you about what?

"That being in love with that beautiful, amazing girl that walked into Watoo's junk shop would be so difficult and confusing all these years later. That I couldn't be with her the way I wanted because of the rules of the Jedi order" he said starring into her eyes intensely.

"I know Anakin; I know I care very much for you. I don't know what to do about it, but do we have to figure it out right now? We have the whole night ahead of us".

"That we do my lady; so what should we toast to"?

"How about to old friends" she smiled at him.

"And new beginnings" he finished as he clinked his glass gently to hers.


	2. The Air Always Smells of Flowers

Chapter 2: The Air Always Smells of Flowers

Anakin followed Padme outside into the night on a Naboo moonlit balcony overlooking the tranquil lake. It was a warm comfortable night to be near the water coupled with the exquisite sight of a sparkling star filled sky. A soft pleasant fragrance of flowers all around them took hold of their senses. Padme held the now uncorked bottle in her hands, and Anakin held their glasses. They had decided to bring the wine and glasses out with them for later. They set them aside on a small table beside two lounge chairs on the balcony.

"Come on I'll give you a tour" she smiled and took his hand.

"Alright he said, and flashed a mischievous smirk".

Padme led Anakin down the stairs towards one of the many gardens at the beautiful lake retreat.

"I used to love to plant flowers, it was fun to come back after a visit and see how they had grown". See those pink roses over there I planted those."

"Really you planted those?"

"Yeah my parents always believed in the value of hard work like planting.

My mom can spend hours in our garden. I loved the feeling that I had created something with my hands."

"And what beautiful hands they are my lady". He said as he kissed her hand gently and gazed into her eyes.

"Thank you Anakin". She blushed from the brush of his soft lips on her hand.

"I've never planted anything. On Tatooine there's only sand; the closest thing there to agriculture is moisture farming. But I love to work with my hands.

I've always loved fixing things and building things. I'm building my light saber; it's one of the last parts of my training".

"That's wonderful; it must be a challenge to build your own light saber. What color is it going to be? Is it going to be bigger then the one you have now"?

Padme realized the double meaning, and innuendo of where the conversation could be heading towards. She knew that she sounded perfectly innocent, but inside her mind was headed in a curious direction she knew she shouldn't be taking. She wondered if Anakin could sense what was really behind her words. What had gotten into her? She had never, never thought about such things when being around any man before. She hoped upon hope that he couldn't read minds.

"Well no it's going to be pretty much the same as the one I have now."

"Oh ok" she blushed and giggled to herself.

"What's so funny"?

"It's nothing".

"Doesn't seem like nothing my lady".

"Forget it, I'll tell you later".

"All right", he looked at her curiously.

"Padme"

"Yes"

"Who was that artist guy that you knew? What's was his name?

"Who Palo"? She wondered where he was going with this.

"Yeah him, was he, I mean besides me the only one you've ever kissed"?

"Why do you want to know"?

"I'm just curious"

"Well yes Ani you two are the only ones. What about you? Am I the only girl you've kissed"?

"You know you are Padme; there could never be any other girl". He replied with that smile that made her melt.

There it was out on the table now; they both knew for sure that both were just as

"Un-experienced" as the other. They both suddenly felt naked with nothing left to cover up; it was scary and thrilling at the same time.

Padme savored every moment as they walked together beside the lake with their fingers locked hand in hand, and at other times with his arm around her waist. They stopped in front of the lake underneath a tree casting shadows over the green grass. Anakin held her in his arms taking in her sweet scent. Padme couldn't help but take in his enticing one as well. He put his face close to her hair; it smelled of wild flowers and berries. They couldn't let go of each other, and they didn't want to. Their eyes met and without saying a word so did their lips.

His lips were so soft and delicious as he moved them slowly over hers. Her arms were around his neck and his were around her waist caressing her lower back gently. Padme threaded her fingers though his hair as she felt his tongue sliding over her lower lip. She parted them nervously and his warm tongue entered into her un-discovered mouth. Padme was amazed at how good it felt for their tongues to be touching and quickly lost herself in the feeling. The kiss grew more and more heated as did their breathing. Anakin pulled her against him and she could feel his readiness. That brought her back to reality and she realized where things were going. She tore her mouth away from his in desperation to stop things from going out of control. She hadn't quite decided if she was going to give herself to him completely yet.

"What's wrong "? Anakin said, with hurt, confused eyes.

"Nothing's wrong I just, I just don't know how far I want things to go. I'm just not sure." she said breathlessly.

"But I thought, it seemed like, you liked it".

"I did I loved it". I'm just not sure if we're ready for more and it seemed like things were going in that direction."

"I understand; I don't want something to happen unless you really want it to".

"Thank you Anakin". She said softly.

"Well if I can't have another kiss right now can I have a dance my lady"?

"Of course you can my handsome Jedi protector". She said as she extended her hand.

With crickets and the soft breeze through the trees their only music; they swayed together. Anakin dipped and twisted Padme and the couple laughed. He's so wonderful how am I ever going to say goodbye to him when the time comes? Don't think about that Padme just enjoy it, just go with it she thought to herself.

I want to thank everyone for their kind reviews. I apologize about the mess up with the chapters this is my first time posting a story.I have a very clear idea of where I want this story to go and what is in store for them. This story has been a lot of fun to write and I really love it. Chapter 3 will be up soon stay tuned.


	3. Let Me Take You There

Before we continue with chapter three I would like to let you all know that I saw ROTS last night. This movie is a TRUE CLASSIC and is the best of all six. You know when a movie is a classic when you sit in the theater with your hands on your face through the whole movie almost ready to scream. When your eyes at first sight of the film are so wide from a visual feast. When you're body actually shivers and shakes in your seat at the first sight of the EVIL Palphetine. When the light saber duels are more elegant and spectacular then all others combined.

Oh my freaking god wow, wow, wow. I cried my eyes out and when I wasn't crying, my heart was so heavy for our beloved characters. Hayden was da man. Now everyone who criticized him for his acting can shut the hell up. Not to mention he looked delicious through the whole movie (up until the very end). Anakin and Padme are still my favorite characters after see the entire film. I felt so bad for Anakin what he goes through. He goes through hell. From now on every time I see DV I'm going to be sad. Hayden and Natalie I can not form words how amazingly beautiful they were together. They were so natural together you really believed that they truly, deeply loved one another more then anything. Anakin and Padme are the ultimate star crossed lovers and you will see and understand what I mean trust me. We have a new Romeo and Juliet.

You will love this love story 50 times more after this movie. Hayden was so gentle and sexy with her swoon my heart. Ewan, Ian, Samuel, everyone was brilliant. No bad dialogue in fact some of the most powerful, surprising, moving, and heartfelt lines in the whole sage are spoken in this one. The plot, twists and turns, superb action sequences, there's great surprises. This movie is so amazing and moving that I cried again this morning just thinking and talking about it. Not to mention a kick ass soundtrack by Mr. John Williams. Everything is tied up in the star wars saga. The movie is so human, touching, and psychological. I think it' the most moving movie I've ever seen. I'm not kidding your going to cry especially A/P fans. I will definitely go see this masterpiece Mr. Lucas has given us at least one more time in the theater. And there is no doubt in my mind that this is the real true order that Lucas always intended for us to see the movies in sequence 4,5,6,1,2,3. This is the grand finale folks Lucas has saved the best for last.

And now on to chapter three what will be in store for our young couple?

Chapter 3: Let Me Take You There

As the night grew older Anakin and Padme's connection grew stronger. She felt so safe and happy with him. She felt like she could tell him almost anything, and it hadn't even been that long since he was given the mission to protect her. Padme gazed onto the water, and onto the island she had told him about right before their first kiss. Anakin stood and watched her wondering what was going through that mind of hers.

"I sense your pleasant thoughts"

"My mind keeps drawing me to that island over there". She pointed across the lake.

"Oh yeah the one you told me about when we were on the balcony before, before well you know". He gave her a wicked smile.

"Yes I know" she blushed.

"That's the island you used to swim to everyday, and what else was it? Oh yeah that there was an old man who lived there and used to make sand out of glass. You could look into the glass and see the water."

"Yeah he made vases and necklaces out of glass; they were so magical Ani"

"I wonder if that old man is still on the island?" he asked.

"If he is he would be really old by now" she smiled.

"Maybe as old as Master Yoda, or some of the other members of the Jedi council, that is if he is still alive? Did you ever talk to him? What was his name?"

"Not very often, and he never told me his name. He was quite mysterious a hermit who kept to himself. But I would see him collecting sand all the time. He would have a little table by the shore set up to work by. He had some of his creations displayed there. I was sort of intimidated by him. I didn't want to disturb him. He was always so engrossed in his work. But he did let me look at some of the necklaces, and they were just breathtaking. I wanted to buy one but he would not part with any of them, he wouldn't hear of it. When I asked why he dismissed my question, and I didn't want to press further".

"Well I would have given you a necklace, what's one necklace? Sounds like a strange old man".

"Yeah he seemed sad, but happy to be making his glass" she said gazing at the island again.

"Let me take you there" he whispered in her ear.

"Take me where?"

"To that island, let's go Padme let's go there".

"When"?

"Right now; there's a row boat right there. I want to go there with you. I want to discover the island with you".

"But it's so late Anakin".

"It's never too late like you said: "let's see where the night takes us".

"This is crazy; at this rate we're not going to get to sleep until way after dawn".

"Sleep is over-rated anyway." He smirked at her.

This was crazy, but intriguing; she very much wanted to go back to that island. It was way past mid-night and they would be exhausted the next day. They would be going further away from the lake retreat and deeper into their own secret paradise. It was a chance to uncover a part of her past of her childhood with him; something she could experience completely alone with him. If they went there during day light she knew it just wouldn't be the same".

"All right Ani let's go".

"Are you sure?"

"Yes positive, take me there".

He held Padme's hand as she climbed into the boat. The water was still and calm, unlike the raging hormones that were surging through her at just the thought of being even more alone with him. Going to the island meant having no chance of anyone interrupting them.

"Are you ready my lady?"

"Yes let's go".

Anakin began to row them towards the island as a soft warm breeze hit her shoulders. Padme watched in fascination as his strong arms pushed them ahead. The way he drew in deep breaths as his chest expanded. Her mind wondered onto his amazing fingers that curled around the oars. I wonder what else he can do with those hands of his. She thought wickedly to herself. Again she was doing it, thinking things she shouldn't be thinking. Or should she? What was she going to do with him or to him when they got to the island? Was she ready? Was he? Was their relationship ready to head into un-discovered territory?

"That looks tiring; do you want me to help row too"?

"No, it's no problem at all".

"Ok, just thought I'd ask; it's not fair for me to sit here and let you do all the work".

"You just sit and enjoy the ride" he said smirking at her.

"Alright, have you ever rowed a boat before tonight"?

"No this is my first time my lady" He grinned at her.

"Mine as well. I always swam to the island with my friends; we never took a boat".

Anakin wasn't paying attention he was too busy thinking about what he had just blurted out "this is my first time my lady". Force why am I so nervous? You know why because you've been dreaming of the chance to make love to her for so long now, your doubting yourself, his inner voice answered him. If the moment does come upon us tonight will you disappoint her? Why didn't Obi-Wan tell me love was going to be so confusing and frightening? Couldn't he have at least said more then just "an emotional attachment towards a woman is forbidden". Anakin suddenly felt like he was 16 again……

The memory of being unpleasantly awakened.

"Oh my angel yes my love, yes my sweet, sweet Padme".

"Anakin", Obi-wan watched in confusion, and utter embarrassment of the sight of his young apprentice thrashing around on the bed.

"What is it my goddess? Tell me", he said breathlessly

Yelling off the top of his lungs, and turning bright red "Anakin its Obi-Wan wake up".

The sudden feeling of someone grabbing his shoulders, and shaking him brought him out of pleasant, sensual, fantasies of his dream girl. Anakin blinked twice and saw his master.

"Master what's going on? What are you doing here"?

"We have an early meeting with the council".

"Since when?" He asked still half asleep.

Since last night, it was a last minute decision by master Yoda. There are some important matters to discuss about the separatists".

"How long until we meet them?"

"In about an hour".

"Ok master I'll be ready", he dragged himself out of bed and stretched.

"Anakin wait I want to talk to you minute".

"Yes master"

Obi-wan did not make a point of entering his padawan's room often; but he could not help notice the picture his apprentice had kept by his bed side for a good 6 years. It was a holocube of Queen Amadala with her arm around a young Anakin Skywalker taken during the celebration at Naboo.

"I see you still keep this picture by your bed it's been there a long time".

"I have very fond memories of Naboo and that celebration".

"And of Queen Amadala" crossing his arms with a knowing nod.

"Well she was very kind to me; she was my friend".

"Is that all?"

"What do you mean master"?

"Is that all you see her as? Is that all you want her to be"? He said while raising a suspicious eyebrow.

"I don't know what you're talking about". He turned to walk to the refresher in hopes of a cold shower.

"Anakin, I heard you just now you were having impure thoughts, and they were of Queen Amadala."

At that moment Anakin wished the floor would open up and swallow him whole.

Oh Sith, he had been caught with his pants down. Anakin had enjoyed many, many dreams of the beautiful Queen. What in the universe was Obi-Wan getting at?"

"I'll probably never see her again" He lied through his teeth he knew that somehow somewhere he would see her again.

"That's not the point".

"What is the point"?

"You must learn to control your emotions your passions".

"Yeah I know I know; Jedi are not allowed to feel or think such things".

Obi-Wan was right and Anakin knew it. Jedi were not allowed to give into their desires. And what he desired most of all was Padme. Her stunning image kept wandering into his thoughts: her long silky hair, mesmerizing brown eyes, soft skin, irresistible lips, and elegant petite figure.

"You're right master".

"Remember my padawan an emotional attachment towards a woman is forbidden".

"Ani oh wow it's so beautiful just like I remember it"

Anakin was brought back to reality by the excitement in her voice. Force why think about Obi-Wan at time like this.

"Looks like we're almost there." he smiled at her.

"I wonder if he's still here. I wonder if he still makes his glass".

"We'll find out soon enough my lady".

The island seemed to be calling out to the young couple as if it were meant for them to go there. Neither of them knew what they might find, what treasures it may hold; but some how they knew it would change them forever.

Authors note: I've had the images of the fireplace scene in my mind for quite some time. I always thought it would have been interesting to explore that scene and night further. I got some of my inspiration from reading the ATOC novel. If you haven't read it yet, read it… trust me you won't be disappointed. I want to thank everyone for all your reviews it really means a lot. I'm at work on chapter four now, as Anakin says "this is where the fun begins".


	4. Looking Deeply into the Glass: Part 1

Looking Deeply into the Glass: Part 1

The island lay peaceful with white sand and the lushness of trees all around. Creamy sweet shuura fruit flourished as well as wild berries, and exotic flowers of vivid colors. Hand in hand Anakin and Padme relished in the lovely atmosphere. Anakin stretched out with the force to detect any living beings that may inhabit it. He found none, they were alone and he reached onto his belt to turn on a glow rod to light their way better.

"He used to keep his trinkets underneath this tree quite often. I guess he was afraid the glass would get too hot if it wasn't shaded. He'd spend hours collecting sand on the beach and sketching under the beating sun. It seemed to me he thought little of his health, but the glass was everything.

"A person's mind can get too hot as well; it can crack and shatter like glass. Perhaps he should have thought more of his sanity and less time on the glass. The sun turns your skin red, and casts you off into a deep sleep if you are not careful. He said softly.

"I had many dreams falling asleep on the sand".

"What did you dream about?

"Quite a few things but there are a few that stand out. I dreamed I could some day make a difference, and have a positive effect on people's lives".

"And that you have; how old were you then"?

"I was a young girl from 12 to 13 years of age. "

"That's just a few years before we met".

"Before I met that sandy haired blue eyed boy who saved the day", she smiled at him.

"But it didn't last, did it? There are more, and more separatists joining Dooku. It's just getting so complicated, and worst of all you are mixed into all of it. It just seems like there's something off like something we're overlooking."

"I know what you mean Ani and I don't know what to do about it".

"But we'll find out Padme just like we're going to find this old man's house.

So which way do we go?"

"Right around those trees there's a path that will lead us there".

The tiny cottage looked worn from the outside view as they walked up to the front door. Padme knocked twice, but there was no reply. She slowly opened the old rickety door that revealed an empty dusty cobwebbed room. Padme grabbed his arm suddenly feeling just a bit nervous.

"Its ok don't worry I'm here". He patted her shoulders.

"Maybe this wasn't such a good idea?"

"Of course it is, force take a look at the size of that fire place". He walked over to the mantle, found a lantern, and lit it with his weapon.

"What do you think all these funny looking contraptions are for"? She asked.

Handing her the lantern, "I'm not sure but I'm assuming it's what you use to make glass".

A faint shimmer of colorful light caught Padme's eye. From the other side of the room, against the wall, were many elegantly carved wooden shelves. They held glass creations of all different kinds, a wondrous gallery of vases, goblets, bracelets, and necklaces. They were artfully crafted as: fish, seagulls, boats, sea shells, and a beautiful woman with wide eyes, and long flowing wavy hair that spilled down like a Naboo water fall, all were in shades of blue and green.

Padme carefully picked one up "Look at this one it's the waves of the ocean, and he carved it as if there's sea spray".

"That's incredible what a gifted artist." He slid his index finger over the smooth glass.

Padme walked over to another shelf. "Here are some of the necklaces I told you about." She winked and smiled at him.

Padme was like a kid in a candy store admiring each one as Anakin wondered around the rest of the room, and into a door to the side. He walked into a small bedroom; the bed was made, and upon the pillow laid a leather bond book, and to the side of it was the most exquisite piece of jewelry he'd ever seen.

Padme called from the other room "Anakin where are you?"

Anakin called back "I'm here Padme come in the bedroom you've got to take a look at this".

She walked into the bedroom her eyes immediately drew to the necklace in his hands.

"Oh my, that's so beautiful".

He handed her a delicately carved necklace of angels cut so perfectly it sparkled everywhere like diamonds.

"It's amazing, and here's his journal maybe now we can get some answers?" He grinned at her.

"Do you really think we should read it, it's his personal business"?

"It was sitting right here on the pillow; if he didn't want it read he would have hid it."

She shrugged her shoulder's "I guess your right."

After seeing what this man created I'm really curious to find out more about him". Anakin took her hand, and they sat down on the bed. For a moment both became quite aware that the two of them were in fact alone in a dim lit room sitting close on a bed. Knees touching but using incredible will power they managed to push back their curiosities, and focus on the other curiosity in the room, the old man's journal.

Anakin began to read aloud

Angelica, the name could only be born from heaven. You are angelic a celestial being that can only be reached by the bonds of time. Time it's our enemy and our savoir. Time has caught up with me. I don't recognize myself anymore. A reflection of youth and happiness has been replaced by gray hair, wrinkly skin, and weak bones. But it is my heart that has grown most weak. The beats are still coming. But it's accompanied by nothing, nothing but old blood, coursing through my vanes. I look back and remember my life, and my fading memory wonders back to the moment that changed my existence, the moment I saw you.

I cannot believe that it was seventy years ago to this day that I was once a young boy walking with my father, and older brother on white sandy cerulean beach. We used to go there all the time to collect sand, and go for a dip in the ocean. I remember the first time my father taught me to fish, and when we took our first trip out onto the ocean on our water speeder. But that was all before mom died. Dad was never quite the same again; sure he remarried later, but we knew that mom was the love of his life. No one could ever replace her.

It was just days after the funeral, but my father and brother wanted to take a trip to the shore. The sun was already starting to set, and I was really not in the mood to be there. I remember my dad's insistent words "Russ not another word we're going. We need some fresh air, you'll thank me later". I acted like a complete brat, and complained the entire trip there that I wanted to go home. That was until I saw the most adorable little girl with blond soaked pigtails jumping around in a white bathing suit playing in the waves. I had not smiled for weeks; you seemed to have appeared from right out of the Naboo atmosphere. Suddenly I felt so alive and simply had to run to you, and find out your name.

"That's so cute about the little girl he met her when they were little kids. But I feel so bad that he, and his brother lost their mother that's terrible". She said.

"Yeah to lose your mother at such a young age, but it sounds like his father was a good man; sounds like he was brought up well".

"Yes it does". She nodded her head in agreement

"You know it would have been nice to have a brother or sister."

"I love my older sister Sola she's the best".

"She's quite a sly one as well". He smirked at her.

"What's that supposed to mean?" She shook her finger in front of his face.

"She certainly seemed convinced pretty quickly that I was your boyfriend. She kept giving me this knowing curious look like she knew something; as if she was the cat who had just eaten the canary".

"I know, she's something else at times when it comes to my personal life. Sometimes she doesn't know when to quit, but I know it's all because she loves me, and wants me to be happy.

"Did she say anything about me"?

Sighing "Yes but I don't want to get into it now; I'd rather you just continue reading".

Looking at her and raising an eye brow "Padme"?

"Anakin please just read".

"Alright, alright I'm sorry. This Angelica girl means a great deal to him, and I'll bet that she's the woman molded into the glass".

"Yes you're right; that's got to be her".

Anakin stared back at the page "Ok where were we"?

How will the old man's journal play into the fate of our favorite couple? Don't worry there is a method, and reason for my madness I promise you. Once again I want to thank everyone for all your lovely reviews. I am so touched that you are enjoying the story, and that some are even finding comfort after seeing ROTS. I'm planning on seeing it again soon, and this time probably in IMAX the next chapter is coming soon.


	5. Looking Deeply into the Glass: Part 2

Looking Deeply in the Glass: Part 2

In their imagination they could see the beach, hear the crash of the waves, and smell the salty ocean. It was almost as if they were there themselves. Padme watched as the old man's words glided off Anakin's tongue.

The water hit my legs, and it was cleansing; it was purging all the pain inside me the closer I got to you. The only thing that I could think to say was "hi". You turned to me, and I got my first glimpse of your beautiful bluish gray eyes; you giggled and smiled at me. When you said "hello" I had forgotten my name for a second, and just stood frozen. "Hello in there" you called to me, and I snapped back "I'm Russ and your pretty".  
"I'm Angelica and your silly' and giggled at me again. We swam around for awhile and splashed each other.

You were nine, and I was eight. I was having a great time; that is until you saw my handsome dark haired 13 year old brother. It wasn't my brother's fault he was completely oblivious to it, but I could tell right away that you liked the looks of him. And I was just a skinny pale faced blond haired green eyed shrimp at the time. I wanted my brother to go away but you insisted for him to stay. Truth was my brother was always looking for the cute maturing 12 and 13 year old girls, and only saw you as a little girl, but I was still jealous. I wanted you to look at me like that.

And so it began every time you'd be at Cerulean beach my ridiculously bratty nasty behavior towards you would resurface. I remember how I used to knock down your sand castles; when I threw sand in your hair, and you cried. You'd scream "I hate you Russ, I hate you Russ". I'd call you stupid names like jelly head, jelly fish head; my brother just shook his head at what a moron I was. My father yelled at me, punished me, and told me to cut it out.

Then came the day I completely blew it. It was the day my brother taught you how to ride your Minnie speeder bike, and that was just too much for me. When I saw you hug my brother in appreciation I lost it, grabbed a hand full of sand, and threw it at you. I meant for it to fall into your golden locks, but instead it landed in your eyes. I hated myself and tried to help, but you pushed me away. My brother grabbed your hand, and ran you to the ocean to wash it out. You were screaming, crying, and my brother yelled at me "what the hell is the matter with you Russ?" My father brought fresh water, and washed out your sensitive eyes. He apologized over, and over to your handmaidens, but they wouldn't hear of it; they informed him that they would never take you back here again.

"Little boys can be so immature sometimes".

"Tell me about it. I used to get teased constantly every time I worked on my pod racer by the kids who lived near by".

"Yeah I remember, but you proved them wrong didn't you? I was so impressed with how talented, and mature you were for a ten-year old".

"Well I had no time to be a kid; I grew up quickly being a slave. But my mom tried to give me as much of a normal happy life as she could. When I was really little she would sing to me, and tell me stories at bed time.

"What did she sing to you, what kinds of stories did she tell you"?

"She sang ancient Tatooine children's rhymes in huttese, and say things like "there once was a brave beautiful little boy named Anakin who one day flew away on his shiny ship. He traveled all over the galaxy, made many friends, and helped many people, and he was very, very happy".

"Aw that's so sweet I loved your mother; she was so kind.

"I still miss her, and I'm still very worried about her".

'I know you are, but don't worry everything's going to be ok. She put her arm around his shoulder and smiled at him.

"Thanks I hope you're right". He said to her with worried eyes.

Padme attempted to lighten the mood. "Sounds like Russ's father tried with him, but he was a hard one to handle."

"Yeah he really made an idiot of himself didn't he? He really had no idea what he was doing or how to handle himself around her." He nodded his head in agreement.

"And all because of his jealousy over his brother, hope he got over it, hope he didn't ruin it for good with her, keep reading Ani" She patted his shoulder.

"All right back to the old man's journal". He began to read again.

After the scene I had made that day my father was determined to knock some sense in me, and mold me into a mature, kind, well adjusted young man. As soon as I was of age I began to work at my father's glass shop with my brother. He wanted me to learn the value of work, and earning something. It had been a tradition to hand down the secrets of making glass over several generations on my father's side of the family starting with my great, great grandfather.

Sure there were many machines and droids that could make it in bulk and fast. But my family saw it as an art form that could only be perfected with thought, practice, and skill. My father had naturally planned on handing down the business eventually to my brother. But he had other plans; he was much more fascinated in medical technology. My father was hurt, but he supported his dreams, and sent him off to the medical university, and became a fine doctor.

It was just about time to leave, and I was looking forward to getting together with my friends that night. But first I had to deliver the beautiful crystal chandelier that was commissioned to my father from a rich debutante family. They lived in the finest part of Theed in a huge elegant mansion. The grounds surrounding it alone must have been over a hundred acres. I was let in by the butler, and he showed me inside. I waited in front of a towering spiral staircase. "Hello is anyone here? I have a delivery" I called and was answered with a sweet voice that ascended from the stairs "I'll be right down just a moment". You seemed to float down to me. I went into a trance that never could be lifted when I saw the material of your baby blue dress reveal luscious curves. A gorgeous golden haired goddess with locks that spilled down to her lower back, full rosy lips, and stunning blue gray eyes. Once again I was speechless, and somehow I knew that I had found you again, and this time I wasn't going to let you go.

It didn't surprise me that you didn't want to talk to me once you realized who I was, and what I had put you through. After attaching the chandelier to your parents ceiling we got a chance to talk, and get reacquainted. I finally apologized and you kindly accepted it. At nineteen and twenty things looked like they could be very different for us this time. I was pleasantly surprised when you showed up two days later at my dad's shop. I was in the back making water goblets when my father showed you to the back where the oven was.

Because it was always so hot back there I didn't have a shirt on, and was completely startled by your presence. You blushed and I could tell that you thought I was handsome. That gave me a little more confidence, and I invited you to stay, and watch me make the goblets. It had never even occurred to me up until that moment how amazingly erotic glass blowing could be. But everything changed when I dared you to try it. You put that long metal pipe to your lips, and the molten substance expanded. You were a natural at it, molding the hot glass into any shape you desired. My heart started pounding wildly, and I felt all the blood in my head go straight to my erection. I fought like mad for some self control. When you finally removed the pipe from your mouth you gave me a playful smile, and all thought was lost. Our eyes met, and we slowly moved towards each other, and my lips met yours for the first time.

"Sith is it getting hot in here?" Anakin wiped his forehead.

"You too I thought it was just me" She smiled at him.

"Maybe you could learn to blow glass"? He smirked at her, and took her hand.

"I don't think it's my thing".

"How do you know you haven't even tried it"?

"I just know the thought of putting some dirty metal pipe to my mouth is not exactly appetizing".

"It would be appetizing to watch you".

"Could we just get back to the journal please; you need to cool down. I'll read for a while if you don't mind".

"By all means my lady" He handed her the journal.

No dessert could compare to how sweet it was to kiss you, and it would have gone on longer if my brother hadn't burst through the door with the happy news of his marriage. From then on we were inseparable, spending as much time together as possible. You thought I was funny, a talented artist, and laughed at all my dumb jokes. I couldn't get enough of your wit, charm, kindness, and beauty. My family adored you as well. The sexiest girl I had ever dated, and considering how young I was there had been quite a few.

You on the other hand had never had a boyfriend due to your parent's strict wishes.  
It wasn't soon after we'd been seeing each other that you showed up at my house crying hysterically over the news of your soon to be wedding. It was at that moment that I realized how lucky I had been to have a father who loved me, and wanted me to be happy in what ever path I chose.

Your parents on the other hand were completely different. They were much more concerned with gaining power, and social status. When you introduced me to them, their hurtful words when we told them we were in love: "Our daughter is not going to marry some nobody, a poor glass maker. We're sorry it's already been arranged for her to marry the son of one the wealthiest families in Theed. It's a splendid match that will be the talk of the city, what's done is done". You screamed at them "I never said I would marry him I can't stand the pompous, arrogant, jerk, that's what you want, and I won't do it". Your parents threatened to have me arrested, and I suspect even worse if I didn't leave you alone. They had the power, and money to do it too.

We were married in a garden at the back of my house accompanied by my father, brother, and a few of our trusted friends. But we knew we could not live peacefully there; your parents would never let it rest, and give us their blessing. There was no other choice; we had to leave Theed, for good. Fortunately, we had the chance to get a beautiful honeymoon. It was very kind, and thoughtful of your friend to let us stay at Island Hills her family's lake retreat. We'd have the whole place to ourselves for a week, and it was perfect.

"Oh Island Hills I remember hearing about that place; it used to be directly across from the lake retreat".

"Why used to be"? He asked curiously.

"It burned down years ago; apparently it was thought that one of the servants had gone mad, and set fire to it in the middle of the night. The owners of the manor died it was a tragedy".

"What happened to the servant"?

"He was arrested, and sentenced to death. This, all of course, happened way before we were born. They didn't give him a trial, and I didn't think that was right. I mean even though it seemed to sound like he had done it because apparently he was quite strange; there still was no evidence presented. That's not a democracy or justice. Years later it was revealed that the son had done it over his anger towards his lack of inheritance. After hearing that story, I vowed to fight for what I thought was right. That if necessary I would stand up in court to the republic, and I would attempt to change a rule or law that was false.

"And I'm sure you could pull it off too; I think you could probably get any law changed if you put your mind to it".

"You really think so"?

"Of course I do". He smiled at her.

"Thanks, that means a lot to me that you believe in me that much." She touched his arm.

Padme went back to the journal. She put her index finger to the page, and began to read again.

Our speeder landed on a high hill overlooking the lake. Island Hills was the most romantic place a newly wed couple could have every hoped for. It was a magnificent looking mansion with large windows, elegant balconies, and terraces overlooking impressive gardens. We had just arrived, and the place was deserted. You grabbed my hand; we ran to the edge of the lake. You threw your arms around my neck, and kissed me passionately. "I love you so much Russ" you said when our lips parted. "I love you more then anything; I adore you" I said starring into your eyes. You flashed a flirtatious smile.

I was very surprised but not unpleased when you began unbuttoning your dress showing me your beautiful, curvaceous body. You giggled at me, and invited me to join you. I loved your spontaneity, and rebellious nature that you had no qualms displaying with me. Even though you had been controlled, and held back your entire life by your parents, now you were free.

We swam to the island that sat in the middle of the lake, and ran onto shore completely nude. Laughing at ourselves at how crazy we were behaving, but loving every minute.It was not long before we were rolling around in the sand entangled in each other. Sure we had made love a couple of times before, but this was different. This was our first time together as husband, and wife. Afterwards, we ate shuura fruit, and then ate it off each other. We licked the sweet juice off of our skin, and basked in the warm glow of the sun.

"Um I think it's getting hot in here again". She let out a sigh.

Anakin didn't answer her, and had not moved; he just sat there breathing heavy, and staring at the journal in her hand. Slowly, his scorching eye's rose up to hers. He'd been holding back his desires for awhile since they had been sitting, and reading on the bed. But this last "journal entry" had done him in. Padme could feel the lust rising up within him, and her as well. She just sat there waiting for him to paunch. Anakin launched his face to Padme's neck, and wrapped his arms around her. It all happened so fast, as he kissed and sucked up, and down her neck. Padme couldn't help but hold onto him, and moan into his ear; which only drove him on. He tore his mouth away from her neck, and onto her lips. Suddenly she was being pulled down to the bed with Anakin running his hands up, and down her body.

Releasing his mouth briefly off hers, "I want to swim naked in the lake with you. I want to lick shuura juice off your skin".

Breathing heavily, "Anakin this is crazy this is wrong I don't want it to be here".

"Why not we're alone"?

"I don't feel right about it happening here, not here, it's just not right. This isn't our house it's his".

"Yeah I know, but I can't help it; I want you. I want you so bad Padme, for so long now".

"I really want you too; I just don't want it to be here." She looked into his eyes.

He took in a deep a breath, "All right if that's what you want". He removed his arms from her.

Padme climbed off the bed, and sat down on a chair next to it. Anakin just laid there on the bed trying to heal his bruised ego, and pull himself together. He attempted to calm his body, and mind by closing his eyes, and meditated just a bit. Padme just sat there staring at the floor with her thoughts running through her head.

Hope your enjoyed this chapter I know I loved writing it. Once again I want to thank you all for taking the time to send all your kind reviews. I'm working on the next chapter now.


	6. Looking Deeply into the Glass: Part 3

Looking Deeply into the Glass: Part 3

It felt as if she had been sitting there forever in that chair, when she knew it was really only a handful of minutes. She really didn't know what to say to him after what had almost just happened. She just stared at his quiet body stretched out on the bed. He wasn't talking to her; he wasn't looking at her.

"Are you mad at me"? She asked with a worried tone in her voice.

He replied with a "No" she could barely hear.

"You seem mad at me".

He rolled on his belly, and looked at her. "I'm not mad at you Padme I'm just, I'm just forget it".

"What"?

"I just feel like maybe you just don't want to be with me in that way; that the thought of the two of us in this bed together just doesn't appeal to you".

"The problem is not you Anakin, it's the bed. I feel like we're guests in this house, and that would be just plain rude of us. Besides this place is a little bit spooky; I don't know; it would just be too strange for me".

"It's ok, I understand what you mean. I'm acting like an idiot, I'm sorry". He said with sorry eyes.

"No you're not; I understand how you feel. Do you still want to finish the journal'?

He smiled at her, "Yes of course I do. I'll pick up we're we left off".

The rest of our stay at Island Hills was just as special. After awhile we lost track of how many times, and how many rooms we had made love in. The Lake country was serene, and breathtaking; we just had to live there. We found a quaint little town nearby, and made it our home. Robbins Nest was beautiful, peaceful, and laid back enough for us to blend in, and live a quiet life. It was also the perfect place to open up our own glass shop. Besides making love, making glass made us feel truly connected to one another. I taught you all my skills, and secrets I had learned from my family. The business was a complete success; everyone loved our unique masterpieces. We were able to live well from our loyal customers, and many commissions.

I remember on the first anniversary of our wedding, we took a speeder trip all over Naboo staying at cute little Inns, and breakfast nooks. I gave you your first anniversary present. How I managed to a keep it a surprise I'll never know because you kept asking for hints. But I knew the moment you saw it you were not disappointed. The necklace of crystal angels sparkled around your neck brighter then any star in the sky. And so began my tradition of giving you necklaces, and bracelets each year. We decided that instead of buying something, we'd always make each other things instead as a token of our love.

Sometimes for a change of pace we'd take a trip to visit some of our friends in Coruscant.We would go see some of the space operas, and dance at some of the popular night spots. My father was still running his shop as well with my new stepmother. My family would come to visit us from time to time. And my brother, and his family loved Robbins Nest so much they eventually decided to make a life there themselves with their 5 children.

You loved those kids so much, and they adored their Aunt Angelica. You would have made such a wonderful mother, but unfortunately that dream never came true no matter how many times we tried. You kept on miscarrying; it was pure torture to witness. If we could not conceive our own children, we would eventually just have to accept that for whatever reason; it was not our fate to be parents.

My brother, and his family loved to visit our island; we would all take trips on our water speeders, fish, swim, and make picnics. Eventually, we decided to build a cabin; so we could spend even more time there. Building it brought the whole family together. And then there was the day that unfortunately the family couldn't all be together. My brother's wife had taken their two older children to a friend's party. So the rest of us decided to relax at the cabin. My brother and I were with his youngest son. We were discussing plans to expand the family business, when his youngest daughter ran in to get us. She was crying, and told us to come outside immediately.

By the gods, why did I leave you alone; how could I be so careless, and stupid. It was all my fault; all my damn fault. I was so busy worrying about the business; it hadn't even occurred to me that something terrible could happen. You were watching my brother's two children from the shore; they were playing in the water, and having a great time as always. One of them came out to dry off, but the other didn't. My brother's 11 year old son's leg was caught on a piece of seaweed. He was panicking, and was being pulled under quickly; you told our niece to run, and get help. There was no time to think; you jumped in, and got to him just in time; you managed to free his leg.

I loved your hair Angelica, I loved running my fingers through its silky tresses. It was so long, and wavy. I never thought that it could take you away from me. You had saved our nephew, but you could not save yourself; your long braided hair got caught on another piece of seaweed, and then another piece caught one of your long legs. By the time we got to shore, it was already too late; you had left me. I jumped into the lake, and found your lifeless body with your braid wrapped tightly around your delicate neck. To die so young, strangled, and drowned by your own hair, how cruel can life be?

"What a lousy hand fate gave him, poor guy. Forget about what I said before. Let's not swim in the lake. "

Padme just sat there with her hand around her mouth holding back her tears.

Anakin just stared at her watching the tears swim around in her eyes "Padme are you alright"?

She responded by walking over to him, and he put his arms around her. He looked at her long braid that fell down her back and ran his fingers up and down it slowly.

"It's just so horrible and so unfair". She looked at him with tear stained eyes.

He placed the pad of his thumbs underneath her eyes to dry them. "I know it's very sad. She saved a life, but lost her own. I just thank the force nothing happened to you".

"What do you mean happen to me"?

"You said you used to swim to the island all the time, and you've always had long hair".

"Wow Anakin, I never even thought about that".

"I'm actually a little mad at him now, all that time he knew that swimming in the lake was not that safe, and he never even said anything to you or your friends. He just kept to himself, and made his glass."

"Puts a whole new perspective on things doesn't it".

"It sure does. Do you still want me to read or do you want to leave"? He asked quietly.

"No I want to know what happens next please read to me Ani".

She sat with him on the bed again with her head on his shoulder, and his arm around her; Anakin started to read the old man's next entry.

The whole family came to our island including your remorseful parents to say their goodbyes. We all stood around your body that was surrounded by wild flowers from the island. We cried, and chanted Nubian prayers.

Then we were alone, I didn't want anyone there; it was just between you and me. It took me hours to have the strength to set fire to your beautiful body with skin I'd never be able to feel again. I stood there as the flames engulfed your loveliness. As the smoke rose, my tears just poured down uncontrollably for hours. My anger overcame me, and I screamed, cursed, and pounded my fists into the sand. When you were completely consumed by the fire, I sprinkled your ashes all around the lake surrounding the island. My heart was destroyed; I would never let myself feel again. You were dead, and so was I. I existed just existed; the man I was before I lost you was gone for good.

"Just like Qui-Gon's funeral remember". He said quietly and put his chin on the top of her head.

"Yes I remember that was so sad". She took his hand in hers.

"I wonder how things would have been different."

"You mean if he wasn't killed"? She asked softly.

"Yeah everything changed then didn't it; they would never have trained me to be a Jedi would they'?

Padme didn't answer him; she just sat there thinking about his question. How would things be different if he wasn't training to be a Jedi? How would things be different if she wasn't a senator? You're just torturing yourself Padme by asking these questions she thought to herself. Because the fact remains we're in an impossible situation, and worse yet there may never be an answer to solve it.

Hope everyone's still enjoying the story. I know I am having the time of my life writing it. Once again I thank everyone for taking the time to give your lovely reviews and for reading it. Have I shocked you all with this chapter? The next will be posted soon stay tuned.


	7. The Secrets beyond the Glass

Chapter 7: The Secrets beyond the Glass

Shadows cast across the wooden floor in the cabin. The flame in the lantern by the bed began to flicker, and fade. Padme remained in Anakin's strong comforting arms as he read on.

My brother wanted me to try to find another to love, but he just didn't understand that there was no other. In my heart I was still a married man. I resented him at times; I thought I even hated him, and his children, especially my nephew. Why did one life have to be traded for another? Why did my brother get to have all and me nothing but pain? He got the children; he got the happy long life with his wife. What did I have? A shell of who I once was with a lousy glass shop that just painfully reminded me of what was snatched from us.

As I grew older, I watched my brother's children grow up, and then have children of their own. I watched my brother enjoy the joyous company of his grandchildren. The happier he was, the more miserable I became. I had to get away from everyone. I just wanted to be with you, and no one else. I found myself making more and more trips to our island, and constantly collecting sand to make glass. It was the only two things that I knew could keep you with me. I'd walk around for hours at a time under the beating sun gathering grains, and sketching different designs that I knew only you would love. That only you would love to see as glass.

With all the glass that I have made I have learned what lie's beneath it, the secrets beyond it. Only now do I realize what a fool I have been. You would have wanted me to go on with my life as the man that you knew, and loved. I threw away years and years of my life with anger, and bitterness towards my kind, and loving brother and his family. I even realize that your death wasn't my fault; it was no one's really, but there's one thing that I don't regret, and that is my loving you for all this time.

There has not been a day that has gone by that I don't thank the gods for giving us the precious time we had together, all eighteen happy years of our marriage. To know what it was like to wake up with you every morning in my arms, to laugh with you, cry with you, and to make love to you, my Angelica, my angel. Because I know that few ever get to experience true love, the magic and happiness we shared. Life and love is precious, and delicate as glass. Not a moment should be devalued, taken for granted, or wasted because everything can shatter in an instant.

As I write my finale thoughts to you, I prepare myself for my journey back to you. My mind and my body are tired, and old. I simply cannot be without you any longer; I must see you again. The lake where you remain will soon be my home too. When the water fills my lungs everything will start to go black. The life left in my body will finally be gone. We will finally be together; our souls will rejoin, and this time forever. I'm coming to you now Angelica; I will be there soon.

Anakin closed the journal slowly "Wow, it was his suicide note, one long suicide note".

He removed his arm from around her, and turned to put the journal back on the pillow. Padme stood up slowly, and started walking towards the door.

"Padme are you ok"?

She didn't turn around; she didn't answer; her body began to shutter. Her voice came in shaky with gasps. "I have to get out of here; I have to get out of this house."

She turned, and bolted out of the bedroom door. Anakin sprung off the bed, and ran after her. As he saw her fly out the front door, he called after her.

"Padme wait".

He ran after her as they both bolted their way down the short path that led to the shore. Padme stopped running abruptly out of breath with tear stained eyes staring out on to the dark lake. Anakin just stood there for a moment to let them both catch their breaths.

"It's so scary, it's so confusing, and so painful" She said breathlessly

He walked up to her, and put his hands on her shoulders. "What is"?

"Love, why does it have to be that way"?

"It doesn't have to be, it can also be incredibly wonderful; not even the force can compare to how happy, and alive it can make you feel if it's right".

She turned around to face him. "What are we going to do Anakin? What in Sith's hell are we going to do"? She yelled out with exasperation.

"I think we should do what the old man did".

She let out a crazy chuckle "Oh, and what's that, drown ourselves in the lake" She replied with sarcasm.

"No, I think we should try to come to an understanding like he did of what really matters, what's really important."

"And what's that"?

He put his arms around her, and looked deeply into her eyes "Us Padme, what we feel for each other, our love.  
I understand more now then ever that the Jedi are wrong about love. They look at it as a burden that can only hold you back from doing your duty. We can live a life of existence of service like the Jedi, or serve in the senate, and give your heart, and soul to the republic. But the love that we all feel for one another is what makes life worth living. Otherwise we're just cheating ourselves of something so powerful, so special."

"But if the Jedi won't give us their blessing how can we? I couldn't bear to see you not become a Jedi; it's been your dream since before I even knew you. And I don't want to have to live a lie". She said pleadingly to him.

"I don't either, but I'm positive that from all that we've learned tonight that I can't possibly live without you now. It was meant for us to come here tonight, to find his journal. There's no doubt in my mind that it was the will of the force".

"I don't doubt that either, and I can't imagine living without you, and I don't want to."

"This is meant to be; this is right". He took her face in his hands, and gazed into her eyes.

"I know it is; some how it will all work out. I know it will because I love you Ani so deeply, and completely."

There it was out, she finally had said it. She had finally told him. Anakin's smile lit up brighter then the suns on Tatooine "I love you Padme; I've loved you from the moment I met you, and I'll never stop".

They embraced and kissed slowly, and passionately; he sucked on her lower lip and slowly let it go. They looked lovingly into one another's eyes.

"Do you want me to take you back now"? He asked softly.

"Yes I'm ready."

As Anakin led them back too the lake retreat, all the important lessons that had been learned from the journal began to hit them. They sat quietly with their thoughts running through their minds. Both had gained a new understanding of life, and would use that knowledge in everything that would come towards them in the future together.

I'm working on the next chapter now but it may take longer to finish then all the chapters so far so please be patient with me. Once again thanks everyone for taking the time to read my story and give your reviews.


	8. Realizations and a Blanket of Stars

Chapter 8: Realizations and a Blanket of Stars

The stars would soon fade along with their hauntingly enchanted night. The young couple strolled back up to the lake retreat's flower and vine covered balcony with their arms around each other. Anakin led them towards two comfy lounge chairs.

"Oh look Ani, I had forgotten we had left the wine out here".

"I did too. We kind of went on our own little excursion didn't we"?

"Yes and I'm so glad we did. I've had such a wonderful time tonight".

"I have too; I can't believe the night is almost over".

"It went by so fast didn't it" She said sadly.

"Let's make another toast". He picked up the wine bottle and two glasses and walked over to the balcony balustrade. She stood beside him as he poured them two glasses of wine.

"All right what should we toast to this time"? She asked him with a flirty smile.

He handed her a glass and looked out towards the lake and raised his glass towards the lake, she did the same.

"To Russ and Angelica, we thank you for all you have taught us; where ever you are, we hope you are eternally in love, and happy."

They both took a few sips of their wine.

"That was a beautiful toast" She put her hand on his shoulder".

"I'll tell you what else is beautiful… look at that sky". He looked up pointing towards the dark night."

Anakin and Padme were lying down beside one another on the lounge chair his arm was around her, and her head was on his shoulder. They looked up at the sky admiring the visual masterpiece of their universe. An endless display of moons, stars, and planets was visible as far as the eye could see.

He pointed to a dull grayish planet. "See over there that's the moons of Endor".

"I've never been there" She turned her head to look at him.

"Neither have I but I've passed by it with Obi-Wan. It has nine moons and the largest one is called the Forest Moon.

"Oh look there's Alderaan Senator Bail Organa's planet" She smiled and pointed above"

"Yeah and its sister planet is called Delaya". He gazed into her eyes.

"Oh that's a pretty name Ani".

"Yes it is, and there's Corascant". He pointed up again.

"I hope everything is ok. I still wish I could be there when the vote is decided".

He gently took her hand. "Everything will be alright, don't worry. Do you know which one that is"?

"Tatooine"? She asked.

"My old home".

"That's where everything began didn't it"

"Yep everything changed after that". He massaged her hand with his thumb.

"Do you remember the first words you said to me"? She asked.

"I asked if you were an angel". He looked into her eyes again.

"I couldn't believe those words were coming out of a ten year olds mouth". She smiled at him.

"You know I wish I had that angel necklace to give you. I would have loved for you to have it.

"I wouldn't want it".

"Why not"?

"Because I already have a necklace from you and it's more precious to me then anything".

"You mean the Japor Snippet"?

"Yep I keep it on a chain it's in a jewelry box in my room at my parent's house".

"You held on to that after all these years"?

"Of course I did".

Anakin could sense her need to be close to him as she touched her soft cheek to his. His heart sped up a little faster.

"You know when I carved that for you I was thinking how afraid I was that I'd never see you again. That I had to give you something to show how much I cared for you, how much I hoped you wouldn't forget me".

"You touched my heart; I could never forget you" She said barely then a whisper.

Unable to resist her any longer, he turned his head towards hers, and captured her lips.  
The perfumed, flowery, warm air served as an aphrodisiac to heighten the mood even further. The soft faint sound of lips coming together, and parting echoed around them. After a few moments their lips parted slightly, and their tongues moved to their own music.

Lying on their sides she caressed his face as his hands ran up her sides, and down her back. Padme let out a soft moan as he placed kisses from her mouth to her ear while nibbling, and trailing his tongue around its shell. His fingers ran along her hairline, and over her gold headband while whispering "I love you" into her ear. Anakin pulled away slowly to look at her.

"I love you Ani" She said softly.

He looked at her with bedroom eyes, lifted his hand, and wiggled his fingers just slightly.

Padme felt him using the force to remove her headband gently from her hair and, forehead. The light clink of metal falling to the stone floor was soon followed with a jingling sound of her black beaded choker. He reached around her and began to untie the bottom of her long braid, threaded it apart with his fingers, and spread it all around her shoulders.

"I love your hair, it spills down all over like a rain storm". He said softly, while still running his hands through her silky, brown, tresses.

Their lips met again with even more passion. She climbed on top of him. The curtain of her hair blocking the view of his lips trailing down to her chin, and neck. Her hands were clutching his leather vest as she felt him pull down the zipper to the back of her dress. He was devouring her neck. The nerve points were coming alive as the pace of his tongue moved quicker, and quicker; their breathing mimicking their hearts racing in their chests.

Padme was losing all control from the sensations he was giving her. The sensual seductive woman in her was tired of being in its cage, and was to ready to break out. She lifted her body up to unhook his leather vest, and helped him take it off along with his tunic. She rubbed her hands over the smooth skin of his bare firm chest, lowered her mouth, and began with soft kisses. The feeling of her wet tongue fluttering all around gave him shivers, and he let out a moan as she licked his nipples lightly. Her eyes were wide with delight as she looked at him up, and down. Padme gripped her hands firmly to his biceps.

"I guess wielding that light saber of yours can't do any harm, and has served you well". She smiled seductively down to him.

He smirked back, and flipped them over peeling the top of her dress down with the motion; their bare chests rubbing over each other as hungry mouths crashed together. His body firmly pressed to hers.

"Anakin" She winced.

"Yes my angel"

"Your light saber is digging into me".

"Oh sorry" He blushed.

Anakin unhooked his belt, and placed his light saber on the floor next to them. He could just hear Obi-Wan now "this weapon is your life; don't just leave it lying around on the floor". Yeah, but Obi-Wan isn't here now he grinned to himself. Anakin studied her beautiful face, and figure. He wanted to capture the image in his mind forever. The desire to touch her overwhelmed him. He reached for her, and glided his hand over one breast gently. She's as soft, and as delicate as rose petals he thought to himself.

The feeling of him massaging her breasts felt wonderful; she closed her eyes to relish what he was doing to her. Electric shocks went up her spine as he sucked one of her rosy nipples into his warm mouth. She could no longer hold back her moans; which only furthered his excitement. Padme ran her fingers through his hair as he sucked, licked, and kissed all over her breasts. Oh my Gods! Are we really going to do this out here she thought to herself?

"Umm…..what if we get caught?" She asked breathlessly.

Anakin shook his head no. "Everyone's asleep I can feel it". He said as he grabbed her dress along with her panties, and pulled them down her legs, and onto the floor.

His mouthed dropped open when he saw all of her.

"You're stunning, absolutely beautiful". He said starring at her intensely.

"Thank you Ani" She said softly.

She was naked for the first time in her life with a man. It was a strange, and exciting feeling coupled with the fact that she knew she was only minutes away of having that scarlet "v" removed from her chest forever. Padme had always assumed that the only way she would be losing her virginity would be as a bride. However, things change when you fall in love with the sexiest man in the universe she thought, and grinned to her self.

Padme's anxiety, and self consciousness rose up in her chest as he ran his hands up her calves, inner thighs, and in between them. She laid her head back, and closed her eyes as he began to move his long fingers over her delicate folds. He moved them like a tracking system searching slowly for her most sensitive area. Her body jerked up, and she began to moan when he found it.

"You like that"? He asked in between kisses in a low sexy voice.

"Yesss……". She said in a tone she didn't recognize.

Anakin began to stimulate her on the tiny spot that wiped all coherent thought out of her mind. He watched in fascination as she became completely unglued with pleasure when he slipped one finger inside her. He could feel that she was ready for him. She was already getting close to the edge; she didn't want it to be this way.

"Anakin stop" She called to him in desperation.

"What Why"? He asked.

"I want you to make love to me, now".

"Are you sure"?

"Yes please Ani".

He nodded, and removed the rest of his clothing. The moment lied before him, and a sudden wave of nerves took hold of him. His skin felt hot, and he began to sweat.

What if I hurt her? What if I disappoint her? He thought to himself.

"Anakin are you ok; you're turning bright red"?

"I'm ok don't worry". He said breathing heavily.

She stroked his hair, and smiled at him. "It's ok, listen to your heart Ani relaaax "

She said in a soothing seductive voice.

Force she's so calm, and I'm a nervous wreck, this is definitely not the Jedi way he thought to himself. Anakin closed his eyes to try to gain some control; his mind wandered back to ten years ago. Qui-Gon's words right before the pod race "remember concentrate on the moment; feel, don't think use your instincts".

Finally, the word, and feeling both were echoing in their minds and bodies as he began to ease his length into her. He became intoxicated by her sweet nectar hugging, and bathing him. A feeling of completion, ultimate connection, and love swept over them. A brief few moments of pain took hold of her as he did away with the last remnants of her purity. Padme clutched his shoulders, whimpered, grit her teeth, and squeezed her eyes shut.

A tear fell from each eye from the overwhelming sensation of him entering her. Anakin kissed each of her eyes gently, and down the track of her tears. Her wet eyelashes fluttered open to look at him.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry; do you want me stop"? He asked with worry and guilt in his voice.

"No please don't stop". She said softly.

"But I hurt you".

"I'm ok Ani don't stop". She said with a tone, and look of desperation.

As Anakin began to move Padme marveled in the feeling of being one with him.

Now I know what the other part of being a woman is all about, she thought to herself. Padme wrapped her arms, and legs around him straining to gather as much of him as possible. Force she feels soooo good. The words pounded into his brain over, and over as well as their hearts in their chests.

The sounds of ecstasy filled the night air as they rocked in perfect rhythm together.  
Her heavy eyes managed to capture the sight of him staring hungrily over her, as well as the magnificent sight of space looming over them. Their bodies moved faster; the fire inside them grew hotter, and hotter; both calling out the others name as they bounced each other off the stars. An intense release of orgasmic waves suddenly ripped through their bodies. They felt weightless as if they could look down on themselves.

Amazed at the incredible sensations they had just experienced their bodies tingled all over with satisfaction. Padme was still underneath him; they were both covered in sweat, and both were still trying to catch their breaths. Wow, now I know why he's named Skywalker; she thought, and grinned to herself while stroking his damp hair.

Anakin lifted himself up to look into her eyes. He glided his index finger over her lower lip and bent down to kiss her. She is an angel he thought to himself as he kissed her tenderly.

"promise me". She said breaking the kiss.

"Anything"

Brown eyes looking deeply into blue. "We're always going to listen to each other, trust, and be there for one another".

"You have my word, and my heart. We are in separable".

"We're a team; you're a part of me now". She said still stroking his hair.

"Forever my love" He bent down to kiss her again.

The stars were their only blanket as they made love once again. Promises and vows were made. Lessons learned, and knowledge gained. To hold in their hearts and souls. The evening had gone in an entirely different direction then either could have predicted. It was a night of exploration, personal, and sexual discovery. Anakin and Padme had experienced more in these precious hours together then any other time in their lives; their last night of innocence.

Do you need a cigarette now? Well that's it for this story folks hope you enjoyed it.  
I'm doing a sequel but chapter 1 will not be posted for awhile. Hopefully I'll have enough written and thought out in a few weeks. I want to write quite a bit of it out first. I still have some ideas I'm trying to figure out. But I think it's going to be really fun and challenging to write. I hope everyone will enjoy it. Once again I really appreciate all your kind reviews. Thanks for reading my story.


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